Teenagers and Freedom

'Only people who have been allowed to practise freedom can have the grown-up look in their eyes.'  EM Forster

This is such good advice for parents of teenagers - and so incredibly scary!  How much freedom do we give our children in order to both keep them safe and give them the space to grow up properly?  I think it is about doing it in steps - giving them a small amount of freedom and seeing how they handle it.  I also tend to adopt the attitude that if my teenage children can give me a thoughtful plan for how they will keep themselves safe in a particular situation, then they are mature enough to handle that situation.

For example, my daughter, Ellie, loves to ride.  She wanted to do some jumping. I was anxious about this - pictures of her falling and terribly injured in my mind.  Ellie knows I am anxious about this, so, when she asked me if she could jump her horse, she spoke to me about what she had in place to keep herself safe.  The plans where detailed and sensible - so I said 'Yes'.